A week ago tonight, I looked down at my legs and nearly had a heart attack! They were so swollen, that my toes were beginning to resemble small pigs and the skin was a funny color or shade of blue/purple. Yikes, they hurt so bad that I had a hard time walking. Thats it, I knew a week ago that something needed to change and quickly. Googling Hypertension and natural means of reducing it brought up! It sounded reasonable, DASH diets and something worth trying out. Desperation creates quick motivation it seems. Fast forward 48 hours and the swelling and reduced immensely, I was feeling really good and seemed to have a lot of energy. I was truly amazed at how less stressed I was feeling and patience for dealing with kids, dogs, mother- in-law, household chores, bills, paper work stacking up on the kitchen bar was truly amazing!! Wow, I thought this is fantastic, not only am I loosing inches here on a daily basis, I can sleep, my stress level is pretty non-existant and I have more energy than I know what to do with!!
Than I woke up this morning and wanted to bite everyone's head off, including the dogs! Yep I was in complete and total rebellion!! I refused to eat breakfast at home and instead went out! Fortunately there is a place called Big City Coffee and I ordered a plate of beautiful red strawberries, green apples that crunched when bitten into, sweet grapes and juicy grapefruit. Their whole grain bread with fresh butter was to die for, and the Quiche made out of feta cheese, artichoke hearts, basil and sun-dried tomatoes, I thought for sure I was in heaven. A small cup of espresso with a bit o honey hit the spot!!
Ah, I thought this is exactly what I needed, a break from the routine, no kids and certainly no gabby mother in law talking about nothing. But I still had that edge, the one where anything that goes wrong, is said wrong or hits the wrong buttons, all hell breaks loose. Inside I am going wow, this is interesting as for the last six days I have not felt like this at all.
Suddenly it dawned on me, I had hit the wall, the emotional wall where your body and soul says ok, I need something different. After two pieces of Papa John's Vegetarian pizza, a big glass of cold water and no kids to complain about food, I finally was able to relax.
Its ok, I am not going to beat myself up for succumbing to a chocolate splurge in the middle of the day, or skipping lunch for that matter. I didn't need to be on the routine today, I needed a break from the single mindset that focuses only on the schedule, the required amounts of food, the salt intake in order to keep my sodium under 2,000mg a day. Ok, so its day six and I did not make a full week without hitting the wall, but its alright, because tomorrow I will be eating my required servings of fruit and veggies, making sure I am eating enough of the right things in order to stay where my body needs me to be.
So I hit a wall, and I think I am old enough now to realize, its ok to rebel a little, within reason. I need the balance and the diversity because if I don't look out world, I am not a happy camper.
The point I am realizing, age seems to do this too you for some reason, is that in order to be successful, you have to divert off the path just a tad, and enjoy something new and or different for that moment in time. Than once again one can march forward with the goal of becoming healthy, eating what works for one's body and enjoying what we take for granted.
After dinner I finally feel alright, no over the top anxiety or stress, the irritation at others has slipped away into the evening light. I can hear the birds calling to each other as the sun slowly goes to bed; as I write these words, I can say, It was alright that I dashed into the wall today. I needed it, and now its onward into day 7 of this new way of life and living!!
